ext_3101 ([identity profile] ladyelleth.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] b2mem2012-03-04 05:34 pm

Cradle to the Grave, by Elleth

B2MeM Challenge:
N43: Discoveries: Anatomy, Four Words: smith, consonance, cradle, mantle, Horror: Spiders, flies, and maggots, Landscape: Cove, Weather: Sleet, Women of the Silmarillion: Women of Numenor
I22: AU Card: And in that year, the Necromancer, Sauron, revealed himself, and he broke the Council that had come to assail him..., Here We Come A-Caroling: "heedless of the wind and weather", Colours: Lavender, Economy: Climatic Change, Femslash: Valier, Festivals: Funeral/Wake, Food and Drink: Hunting and Gathering, Four Words: order, cascade, small, dogwood, Occupation: apothecary, Relationship: remarriage, Second Age: The Gift of Men, Weather: Hurricane, Write What You Know: A character you dislike--what might you have in common?

Format: Fic
Genre: Double-drabble
Rating: Teens
Warnings: References to death, doom, destruction. Standard Silmarillion fare.
Characters: N/A
Pairings: Vána/Nessa if you squint really, really hard.
Summary: A short history of Númenor.
Note: About the insane number of prompts - I made it a challenge to myself to fit all of my current prompts into the shortest possible space I could. A drabble didn't quite work out (I tried!) but it still was fun.


Consonance surges as the Smith's hammer tears open Arda's mantle. From her cradle, Númenor arises. Waters cascade, and from small beginnings the melody unfolds. Men and women disembark, order prevails for a time. In Nísimaldar, dogwood flowers large and white, and all but the wisest begin to fear their winter. Thence their plight begins: Knowledge of certain death, driving apothecaries and anatomists alike to find eternal life, grants Noirinan no grace, but wakes of dissonant weeping. Estë and Nienna are no longer loved, Vána and Nessa take comfort from one another while human lips curse them as mockeries. Endings abound.

Crops fail, drown, burn, never grow. Hurricanes lash them, sleet stings them, but heedless, cruelty drives people hunting and gathering, to make graceless sacrifices left to flies and maggots: Not fruits, but others' Gifts, substitute returns by force. The old ways shatter; spans shorten, wives and husbands are callously replaced. Discord swells in coves and under skies no longer lavender at dusk. The Necromancer, falsely humbled, assails the council's minds, to war. Manwë grieves the necessary justice to be ordered. Consonance surges as the Smith's hammer tears open Arda's mantle. And Númenor, as all things must, goes to her grave.

[identity profile] blslarner.livejournal.com 2012-03-04 05:13 pm (UTC)(link)
You managed to make them fit brilliantly!

[identity profile] pandemonium-213.livejournal.com 2012-03-04 05:16 pm (UTC)(link)
That's fabulous, Elleth! Spot-on word choices (prompts and otherwise ;^)) and a great rhythm, rising, swelling, then crashing. It reads like poetry. I love the imagery of the Smoth's hammer (tearing) open Arda's mantle that serves as bookends to "Cradle to Grave," which serves as an excellent illustration of how careful attention to wordcraft yields a powerful tale in an economy of words.

[identity profile] pandemonium-213.livejournal.com 2012-03-04 05:17 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, and..."References to death, doom, destruction. Standard Silmarillion fare." LOL! How true, how true!
moetushie: Beaton cartoon - a sexy revolution. (arthurian → wart)

[personal profile] moetushie 2012-03-04 07:43 pm (UTC)(link)
I am still astonished at your ability not only to incorporate so many prompts into one coherent piece -- but to make beautiful and heartbreaking as well! Ah!

[identity profile] huinare.livejournal.com 2012-03-05 01:04 am (UTC)(link)
Wow, what an intense piece, both in terms of the emotion evoked and the incorporation of so many prompts. I, too, really liked the dual usage of the Smith's hammer with the cradle/grave images that start and end the piece.

Also: "The Necromancer, falsely humbled, assails the council's minds..." <---that is a clever inversion of words and ideas, one which I tend to think the Necromancer himself would approve of. =]

[identity profile] huinare.livejournal.com 2012-03-06 10:39 pm (UTC)(link)
I actually have a horror fic in the works that does deal with Sauron breaking the White Council..

*Will be looking out for that one!*

[identity profile] engarian.livejournal.com 2012-03-05 09:32 am (UTC)(link)
Whoa! I always knew I wouldn't want to live on Numenor.

- Erulisse (one L)
ext_403546: (Default)

[identity profile] nelyo-russandol.livejournal.com 2012-03-05 04:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Wow, great feeling of words pounding one after the other, as though echoing with the blows of the hammer of the Smith. Really powerful images come to mind, too. Really unique, and a very cunning way to incorporate so many prompts!

[identity profile] heartofoshun.livejournal.com 2012-03-05 05:22 pm (UTC)(link)
I like this so much. I had to recommend it on my LJ. Hope that is OK.

[identity profile] dwimordene-2011.livejournal.com 2012-03-05 07:57 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm impressed - cradle to grave, all of Numenor's history in between two hammer strokes. With this Vala's eye view of time passing, the reader gets a little dizzy, watching Numenor and its people surge up and then collapse so quickly like this. Great, visceral engagement of the reader through the words.

I like this phrase in particular: Not fruits, but others' Gifts, substitute returns by force. You really manage to capture the heart of this transformation. Well done!
nienna324: (Default)

[personal profile] nienna324 2019-03-12 07:45 pm (UTC)(link)
This is amazing! It paints such a vivid picture of such long spans of time! And the way you fit all the prompts in is incredible!
This piece has a sense of rhythm and inevitability to it- everything rises and fall, almost like waves on the ocean moving up and down.