b2mem | The ABCs of Arda

B2MeM Challenge: B10: Genre 2: Poetry
Format: Poem
Genre: Humor
Rating: General
Warnings: Extreme inanity and blatant authorial bias
Characters: N/A
Note: I have no excuse.

The ABCs of Arda

A is for Alqualondë, where elves slew their kin
B is for Beorn, who changes his skin
C is for Carcharoth, who bit off Beren's hand
D is for Dor - that's Sindarin for 'land'
E is for Ecthelion, who took a deadly bath
F is for Fëanor, the homicidal polymath
G is for Gil-galad (his spear was quite long)
H is for Harad, which teamed up with Sauron
I is for Idril, who took two long hikes
J is a letter Tolkien clearly disliked
K is for Khamûl, who rode a fell beast
L is for lembas - one bite is a feast!
M is for Maglor, who wandered by the sea
N is for Nimloth, Numenor's white tree
O is for Oropher, who was a bit dim
P is for Petty-dwarves, the people of Mîm
Q is for Quenya, a high-elven tongue
R is for Ringil - run, Morgoth, run!
S is for Silmarils, which caused lots of strife
T is for Tar-Aldarion, who was horrid to his wife
U is for Ulfang, who served as a spy
V is for Varda, who lights the night sky
W is for Wormtongue, who's creepy as hell
X is for nothing, as far as I can tell
Y is for Yavanna, whose tree spawned the sun
Z is for Zimraphel, and now like Numenor we're done!