b2mem | Hobbits' Washing Song in Time of the Plague, by Himring

B2MeM Prompt: March 3: Think of something that happened to you today and write down the first thing that comes to mind. Start your fanwork with your character having a similar experience or performing a similar task.
Format: Poem
Genre: humor, parody (a loving adaptation, not a satire)
Rating: Teens
Warnings: Reference to the canonical Dark Plague (yes, this piece does allude to COVID-19)
Characters: n/a (unnamed early hobbits)
Pairings: n/a
Creator’s Notes: An adaptation of Bilbo's bath song as sung by Pippin in FOTR. (If you think that in-universe Bilbo could not possible have adapted material originally relating to the Plague for his song, do remember that some jolly-sounding European children's songs refer to very dark times. Apologies, however, if anyone finds the association disturbing!)
Summary: Some hobbits in S.R. 37, when the Plague reaches Eriador, discover thorough washing, especially washing of hands, can help to hold it back and make up a song to promote it.

Sing hey! for the wash at close of day
(and the start of day and the middle of the day),
the wash that washes the Plague away!
Who is it among us who will not sing:
warm water and soap are a noble thing!
Better than rain or rippling streams
is soapy water that bubbles and steams.
Dry towels and spirits we use at need
and sniff and cough in our sleeves indeed;
but better is soap, unless we lack,
and water warm on the hands and the back;
better is water, no part to be missed,
soap on the nails and rubbed on the wrist,
better is water and soap on the palm,
rub it right in and let it be warm!
Sing hey! for washing every day
the wash that washes the Plague away!